Like many of you, when I was little, people asked me the question, “what do you want to be when you grow up?” Even though this question was overused, I still absolutely LOVED answering it. I thrived off of dreaming up endless possibilities of what I could be when I was older. I was (and still am) a creative kid, so my answers were as far out as you can imagine! I mean, look at me. Did I look like a kid who gave ordinary answers!?
I wanted to be a…
- Veterinarian
- Student at Hogwarts
- Participant in the Hunger Games
- Mud-pie maker
- Frog catcher
- Motorcycle rider
- Physicist
and that’s just to name a few!
Even though I had many creative answers to that age-old question, I wanted the right answer and I wanted one answer. What was the one thing I was going to do—the thing that was going to make me who I was, that would define my identity forever and ever!?
Yeah, uh, I had no idea. I still don’t.
I read somewhere something that changed my perspective forever. I read that you will never be just one thing, and when I read that, I felt as if a weight was lifted.
So, I threw out all my preconceived notions. I let myself love being more than one thing. I focused on all parts of who I am instead of trying to pinpoint just one. I am proud of these things! They make up who I was, who I am, and who I am becoming.
In the past, I have been (and am still, for the most part)…
- stubborn
- curious
- easily distracted
- easily-entertained
- creative
- unique
and right now, I am…
- adventurous
- a creator
- self-aware
- loving
- studious
- hard-working
and I am becoming someone who is…
- quick to admit when she’s wrong and learn from her mistakes
- wise
- who knows her beauty comes from within
- confident
- welcomes uncertainty
- adapts to any situation
If you haven’t noticed, none of these have anything to do with a profession. Another thing I’ve read along the way is that our value doesn’t come from our work. When it does, we drown in trying to be good enough for everyone all the time. Even though I know my value won’t come from my work, the possibilities still excite me. I love…
- photography
- graphic design
- real estate
- interior design
- writing
- religion
- youth ministry
- cooking
There are still so many options for me, and I love that! These are all things I have been gifted in as well, which is definitely something to celebrate! However, I realized that what was actually behind those career options was a longing to be a certain type of person—a longing to embody the characteristics I mentioned earlier: a longing to be quick to admit when I was wrong and learn from my mistakes, to be wise, to know my beauty comes from within, to be confident, to welcome uncertainty, and to adapt to any situation. It’s a longing to be more like Jesus, to say it plainly.
Jesus tells us that there are things about our identity that will never change, and it is because of those qualities that I am able to grow to look more like Him. No matter what I do, or what profession I choose, I will always be…
- LOVED.
- CHOSEN.
- A DAUGHTER OF THE KING.
- FORGIVEN.
Out of all the lists I’ve made, the items in the one above matter most. And even still, I am never just one thing.
So, if you’re like me and you’re still trying to decide what to be when you grow up, stop trying to decide. Explore things and create things and get to know yourself, but know that if you can’t decide, that’s okay. Have peace in knowing that you don’t have to choose an answer to the question of “who will you be” because throughout your life, you will be many things. I assure you, when you look back at your life, you won’t see that you were only one thing.
While the things we do may be important, like our jobs and our hobbies, we are not loved based off our gifts or our performance. We are loved because we are loved. Jesus doesn’t tell us to just “do better.” Instead, He asks us if we will let Him love us better. We are LOVED by Jesus, CHOSEN by Jesus, and FORGIVEN by Jesus. We are DAUGHTERS AND SONS OF THE KING. All of our other identities may vary, but truth of those never will.
Find me at any of the links below!
Ellie Proctor 
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